How to Ease the Process of Moving into a New House for Your Kids
One of the constants in life is that change is going to happen. Nothing stays the same for long, and our efforts to force things to remain static will leave us feeling anxious, frustrated, and exhausted. Situations evolve, and living things grow in different and wonderful ways. This means that promotions and job changes happen, opportunities open up while others close down, relationships change, or one’s needs and means may shift, and we may find ourselves moving to another home.
The stress of moving
What this all adds to practically is that people will often uproot and move elsewhere. The move can be just a few blocks away, to a different state, or to another country altogether. Moving is one of the most stressful events in a person’s life because of the amount of work it takes, but also because of other issues such as the loss of community and need to navigate new situations and rhythms.
If moving is stressful for the adults in the room, you can be sure that it will be stressful for the little ones in your home, too. Moving might mean changing schools, losing friends, and needing to try and fit into the new situation, and it could mean other things too like no longer having extracurriculars that enriched their lives. While moving is stressful, there are some things that you can do to ease that process for your children.
Tips to make it easier
Adults and children have different coping mechanisms, and they have varying capacities for dealing with stress. As you start the process of moving, it’s good to be on the lookout for signs of stress such as anxiety, mood swings, restlessness, being clingy, developing new or recurring fears, crying more and having more anger, stubbornness, or aggression.
Other signs of stress in kids and teens include decreased concentration or motivation to do things they used to do. Lastly, if your child is stressed, you may find that they have emotional overreactions to minor incidents. These and other signs could point to the fact that your children are stressed by the move. The good news is that while the stress of moving can be challenging for you and your kids, there are ways to make the transition smoother.
Some tips for easing moving stress include the following:
Communicate honestly and openly
The fact that you’ll be moving is obvious enough, but what isn’t always obvious is why. Take the time to explain to your children, at an age-appropriate level, the reasons for the move, and then take time to listen to their concerns. Validate any concerns that they have and address these as honestly as you can. Give them room to express themselves, whether by talking, drawing, or writing.
Involve them in the process
Instead of a hands-off approach, let your children take ownership of the move and start processing it by helping with packing, labeling, and decision-making. They can decorate the moving boxes, or you can turn packing into a game for the younger children. You can also do things like create a scrapbook with memories of your old home.
Maintain your routines
As the move gets underway, it’s easy to lose your old routines. Rather, try to stick to your regular routines and traditions to provide a sense of stability for everyone, including yourselves as parents. For instance, keep dinner time and bedtime routines the same to allow for familiarity and a sense of normalcy.
Maintain a positive focus
The move might be the result of losing your job and needing to downsize, but even in such circumstances, there may still be positives to celebrate, like the new community you’ll be a part of or certain features of the new house.
Remain patient, present, and supportive
Moving is stressful, and that means you’ll need an extra helping of patience and understanding during this transition period. Everyone in the house needs support at this time, and it helps to be girded with grace and to be quick to forgive each other any slights (Colossians 3:12-13).
Have a farewell party
Being able to say goodbye to friends well helps to create lasting memories, and it’s a way to celebrate the upcoming move. Keep the party light and enjoyable, focusing on the good memories you have had in your home, and the plans you have in your new space.
Make the new house feel like home
When you arrive at the new house, set up the children’s room first to help them feel secure and settled as soon as possible. You can unpack some of their favorite items together. You can also take time, whether when you move or some days before, to explore the new area so that you discover new parks, restaurants, and attractions together.
Moving house will affect you and your children in different ways. Each child will have unique needs, which will require you to adapt the ways you show love and support to them. Change can be hard to navigate, but you can walk with your children through this.
You can also reach out for help to a family counselor in Newport Beach if your family is struggling with the move. Your counselor in Newport Beach, California can offer you the support you need to transition well. Contact us at Newport Beach Christian Counseling to schedule your first appointment today.
“Potted Flowers”, Courtesy of Annie Spratt, Unsplash.com, CC0 License