Building Connected and Healthy Relationships as Believers in Christ
Do you feel lonely or like you don’t have close friendships or relationships in your life? Do you struggle with self-consciousness, low self-esteem, or lack of trust? Being surrounded by supportive, understanding family and friends sounds good to all of us, but it’s not always simple to have close, successful relationships.
You’re not the only one who struggles with this; many other people go through the same thing. Christian relationship counseling can help you find a connection with others in a healthy, God-honoring way.
Christian Relationship Counseling: A Success Story
Matt’s Story, Part 1: What’s Missing?
From the outside, Matt’s life seemed perfect. He was a recent college graduate and had found a good job. He had a nice apartment, a dog, and a promising future ahead. In spite of all this, he still struggled with a sense of emptiness. He felt alone and lacked fulfilling companionship.
During college, Matt had focused on studying. He had friends, but their connection remained mostly surface-level because he didn’t the time to invest in anything deeper.
Even at church, the sense of loneliness didn’t fade. Matt had questions and doubts that he felt were unwelcome. The platitudes he heard in response didn’t satisfy him. He didn’t want superficial relationships; he wanted real connection and understanding.
Have you faced similar feelings? What obstacles are in the way of the connected, healthy relationships you desire? We can help you identify what’s standing in the way, and offer practical solutions based on the Bible and faith in Christ.
Relationship issues can have many different causes. The first step in Christian relationship counseling is to find out what the issues are in your life that are holding you back. These may include things like:
- Personal problems.
- Past wounds.
- Family of origin issues.
- Low self-esteem.
- Health concerns.
- And more.
As you can see, there are a lot of issues in our lives that can prevent us from having the healthy and fulfilling connections with others that we all desire. Past wounds can lead to fear of being hurt again, leading us to put up walls to protect ourselves. Whether you struggle with this fear or other issues, we can help you work through them so you can have satisfying relationships with others.
Goals of Christian Relationship Counseling
What are the benefits of Christian relationship counseling? Not only do we offer basic guidance for healthy relationships, but we have goals such as:
- Healing past wounds and resolving current fears.
- Helping you nurture healthy relationships with your family.
- Learning how to make friends and maintain friendships well.
- Have a stronger connection with yourself and the Lord.
- Figure out what’s stopping you from having close or healthy relationships.
All of us relate to others in various ways and roles, whether it’s at work, in our families, with friends or acquaintances, romantically, and with ourselves and God. No matter which kind of relationship you’re concerned about, our compassionate Christian counseling is here to help.
Areas of Focus in Christian Relationship Counseling
Matt’s Story, Part 2: Sound Advice
One of Matt’s only close connections was with his brother, who lived across the country. The two of them discussed how to find real friends and have good fellowship. Matt’s brother, a family therapist, gently communicated that Matt had always tended to be a loner and suggested that Christian relationship counseling could be a place to receive an objective perspective.
So what kind of relationships do we focus on? All of them. No matter who it is, you can have a healthy connection that honors God, those he’s placed in your life, and who he’s made you to be.
The areas we focus on, encompassing different areas of your life, include:
- Christian fellowship
- Family relationships
- Romantic relationships
Christian Fellowship and Why It’s Important
What thoughts does the word fellowship spark in your mind? Having a potluck after church on Sunday? Sitting around a campfire sharing testimonies? Taking turns sharing prayer requests?
Christian fellowship is a broad category and can include all of these things, but most of all it’s about togetherness, service, and support in the body of Christ.
Small talk and shared interests are good building blocks of fellowship, but what’s most important is the fact that Christians share a biblical worldview and a commitment to knowing, loving, and following Christ. We are meant to thrive in the body of Christ as we support and encourage one another in the faith.
If you are new to the Newport Beach area and are looking for a good church home, we can offer suggestions that will help you get connected.
Building Fulfilling Friendships
It can be so hard to move beyond superficial acquaintance-level relationships to form real, deep friendships. You can tell if this is the case in your life if you often feel isolated or like your friendships are shallow. You don’t have to stay stuck; it is possible to find accepting, compassionate friends who can help you grow.
It can be difficult to know how to make friends like this, though. We can help give you ways to move towards quality friendships and learn how to maintain them over time.
Growing Christian Families
Home, more than anywhere else, should be a safe and supportive environment. What’s standing in the way of this in your own family? Maybe there’s distance, harsh conflict, or simply a lack of closeness and Christian fellowship. We can help you identify these issues and work on ways to grow.
Your own family unit is unique and has its own strengths and weaknesses. Especially if you’re struggling with conflict or distance, working through those issues with a counselor can help make your home a place of peace.
Wading into the waters of dating and romantic relationships can be scary. What should you look for in a Christian relationship? If you’re in one already, how is it going and how should you proceed? If you’re not sure or you feel like things aren’t going well, getting help can be paramount to knowing how to move forward.
Some of us struggle with vulnerability, or knowing what we really want, or figuring out how to be authentic and true to our beliefs as we develop our relationship with another person. We want to help provide clarity along this journey, as well as wisdom from God’s Word.
Matt’s Story, Part 3: Self-Discovery
Matt was a little taken aback by his brother’s suggestion. He assumed that relationship counseling was for people who have bad relationships. But he thought, “Why not?”
After a couple sessions, Matt saw the value in his brother’s suggestion. He realized that his lack of connection with others wasn’t about his lack of time, but his defensiveness. He suffered wounds as a child growing up in an uncaring and abusive home. This led him to have trust issues and a fear of rejection. He didn’t want to invest deeply in relationships because he thought he would ultimately get hurt.
Matt decided to make an effort to develop relationships at his church. He was surprised and pleased to find that others reciprocated, and he even began dating a young woman there. His future began to look much brighter now that he had like-minded friends to share the journey with.
God created us for relationship. We aren’t meant to live our lives in isolation. If you’re feeling alone and unsure of how to create the connections you need, we are here to help. At Newport Beach Christian Counseling, we’ll offer a compassionate ear and practical advice for building healthy relationships at work, with friends and family, and with a significant other.
FAQ About Christian Relationship Counseling
How is Christian counseling different?
Why seek Christian counseling over a secular counselor? We offer a holistic approach to forming relationships; it’s not just about what the world considers normal or healthy, but about what God ordains in His Word. We consider all aspects of your spirit, emotions, and mind and how the Bible sheds light on healing pain and forming healthy connections with others.
What type of Christian counselor do I need?
We understand it’s important for you to speak with a skilled counselor who’s trained in understanding the dynamics of relationships and how our past and current struggles affect them. We want you to find someone you feel comfortable speaking with. You can visit our online counselor directory to find a counselor who’s a good match for your needs.
Do I need marriage counseling or family counseling?
This will depend on your individual situation. It may be enough for you to seek individual counseling and you’ll notice improvements in your marriage and/or family. Sometimes, though, it may be beneficial to include your spouse or other family members in the counseling process.
You can speak with your counselor during your initial session to talk about your options. You can even continue with individual counseling while receiving marriage or family counseling.
If you’re tired of less-than-fulfilling relationships or lack of connection and feeling alone in your life, contact us today.
If you’re struggling with relationships or loneliness in any way, contact us today to schedule your risk-free initial session.
You can also call us at (949) 668-0335. Take the first step towards having healthy, God-honoring relationships by reaching out to us at Newport Beach Christian counseling.