Signs of Anger Issues to Be Wary of

Anger is one of those emotions that seems big, bold, brash, and hard to hide. That’s because in a lot of instances, when people feel and express their anger, that’s the form it takes. There are endless stories about anger gone wrong, whether at a family gathering like a wedding, Christmas, or Thanksgiving, or dustups between perfect strangers at a local buffet, restaurant, gas station, or parking lot. The internet sometimes seems to run on anger.

With anger so prominent in everyday situations, you’d think we’d be better at identifying it in ourselves and dealing effectively with it. There are sometimes subtle signs of anger that we either don’t take to be anger or that we ignore for various reasons. Detecting anger issues in your life can help to save your relationships and promote your well-being.

Where Anger Issues Come from

What exactly are anger issues? Being angry and expressing that anger doesn’t necessarily mean that you have anger issues. When a person has anger issues, it means that they struggle to control their anger, and that loss of control often has negative consequences in their life, some of them small, but some of them big. Anger has a dominating presence in that person’s life.

If you don’t work on any anger issues you may have, that can affect all areas of your life, including your work, your relationships, and your health. While anger issues are quite destructive, they can also feel like a normal part of one’s life, especially when they are part of longstanding patterns.

Some of the work of undoing anger issues is rooted in understanding where anger issues come from. This differs from person to person, as anger issues can stem from a combination of biological, psychological, and environmental factors, as these interact with the individual’s personality and temperament.

Anger issues may have a biological component. Some inherited traits and one’s temperament may contribute to anger issues. Experiencing changes or fluctuations in your hormone levels, such as your testosterone or cortisol levels, can influence your anger. Lastly, having imbalances in your brain chemistry can also affect whether and how you regulate your mood well.

Psychological factors such as mental health conditions, experiences of childhood trauma, and stress or frustration can all contribute to feelings of anger. Health conditions such as anxiety, depression, or bipolar disorder can all have increased levels of anger and irritability as symptoms.

In terms of environmental factors that might play a role in anger, your family dynamics and upbringing can shape your behavior, including how you understand and relate to your anger. If you’re exposed to violence and anger, or the cultural and social norms you’re immersed in navigate anger in unhelpful ways, it can also contribute to anger issues. Anger may also become a problem if you find yourself in difficult life circumstances that trigger anger.

Apart from these main factors, other things that can trigger anger issues include struggling with medical issues like chronic pain or thyroid disorders, substance abuse, or sleep deprivation. These and other factors may lie under a problem with anger.

How Anger Can Upend Your Life

When you get angry, there is no telling where it’ll take you if you let it. Some things are good servants and poor masters, and anger is one of those things. Anger can upend your life in significant ways.

Along with this goes the idea, “Be angry and do not sin.” As a person who has come under the leadership of Christ and the support of the Spirit, anger is not essentially bad but can become so when not controlled and given the reins to steer your choices. Anger, in controlled usage, can draw attention to wrongdoing and urge the wrongdoers to change their ways (i.e., a picked-on person saying “you need to stop spitting spit wads at me because that is not okay”).

Anger in uncontrolled, sinful form can seek to attack, humiliate, or damage the wrongdoers and end situations altogether (i.e., a picked-on kid (or bully) punching or damaging or humiliating the other person).

Some of the ways unbridled anger can be disruptive in your life include:

Damaging relationships When you don’t manage your anger well, it can lead to frequent and deep conflict with the people in your life. Angry outbursts can strain relationships with others, and you may say things in anger that you later regret. If you’re an angry person, people may walk on eggshells around you or avoid you altogether, leading to social isolation.

Affecting your work life Anger can result in conflict with clients, coworkers, or supervisors, which may result in job loss. If it doesn’t get that far, anger can still impair your judgment by impairing your decision-making and problem-solving skills, impacting job performance. Unmanaged anger may also lead to accidents, injuries, and reckless behavior on the job, which endangers you and other people.

Impact on physical health When you’re angry, it’s a whole-body experience. Anger activates your fight-or-flight response, putting your body on high alert for threats. If you are angry a lot and if the anger is intense, that taxes your body. Chronic anger can increase the risk of cardiovascular disease, high blood pressure, a weakened immune system, and stomach issues like ulcers, irritable bowel syndrome, and acid reflux.

Impact on mental health Just as anger affects your body, it also affects your mind. If your anger isn’t under control, it can contribute to depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, and feelings of guilt and shame. To cope with anger and its effects on one’s life, some people turn to substance abuse, which worsens the situation.

Legal and other consequences Anger can lead to bad decision-making, like assaulting other people or damaging property. This can result in legal action being taken against you, as well as being arrested and possibly convicted. Anger can also lead to financial problems, especially when the anger escalates and results in losing work or facing lawsuits for damage caused to people and property out of anger.

Uncontrolled anger can take a difficult situation and make it worse. This makes it all the more important to address anger issues to deal with life problems without worsening them or creating new ones.

Signs of Anger Issues

Can you tell when you’re getting angry? It’s possible to know yourself well enough to clock when you’re starting to get angry. For some, they feel their face flush or their ears start to burn. Perhaps your heart rate increases, and you get a sense of tunnel vision. Maybe you start talking quite fast and gesturing a lot. Or maybe you go quiet, and you clench your jaws and fists. Each of us has our unique reactions when we start to get angry.

Anger issues can manifest in different ways, and sometimes it’s possible to not even realize that one has a problem with anger. Here are some signs of anger issues to be wary of:

Irritability and mood swings One sign of anger issues is if you easily get annoyed or frustrated, even over small or inconsequential things, and you experience sudden shifts in your mood. If you are irritable or your mood shifts are deep and hard to get out of, that too could point to anger issues.

Sarcasm and passive-aggressive behavior Sometimes, people will express their anger in quieter, more indirect, and less confrontational ways. This includes using sarcasm, backhanded compliments, sulking, rolling your eyes, procrastinating, or other indirect expressions of anger.

Feeling tightness or tension in the body This occurs because you may be frequently clenching your jaws, fists, or tensing your shoulders, indicating pent-up anger or frustration.

Avoiding conflict or difficult conversations Another subtle sign that could point to anger issues is dodging hard discussions or situations that might lead to conflict, instead of addressing issues head-on. If you don’t want to have such discussions because you’re worried about your reaction, especially how you’ll react if you get angry, that could point to anger issues.

Procrastination or passive resistance Another sign of anger issues is when you put off tasks or responsibilities, or you do them begrudgingly to express your anger or frustration with a person or your circumstances.

Overreacting or being overly critical Instead of reacting in a measured way, responding in an excessive or over-the-top way to minor setbacks or mistakes could lead to anger issues. Additionally, if you’re overly critical of yourself or others, that could also be the result of anger issues.

Difficulty relaxing or calming down If, when you get angry, you struggle to unwind or relax, or to calm yourself down even in peaceful environments, that could indicate anger issues.

Substance abuse or addiction Using substances to cope with or numb feelings of anger or the consequences of actions taken in anger may point to anger issues.

Physical complaints Experiencing somatic symptoms such as frequent headaches, stomach issues, high blood pressure, or other physical complaints may be the result of stress and anger issues.

Difficulty apologizing or forgiving If you struggle to admit mistakes you’ve made, to apologize, or to forgive yourself or others, it may be the result of unresolved anger or resentment.

People experience anger differently, and these signs may well point to anger issues, but they may also be rooted in another cause. If you’re concerned about your own anger or that of someone you know, you must consider seeking help from a mental health professional to help you identify and address any anger issues.

Addressing Anger Issues in Your Life

Dealing with anger issues is a process that takes time and concerted effort. There may be habits you’ve accrued over the years that are at play, and it takes time to identify these and begin to unravel and replace them with newer, healthier habits.

You can begin working toward addressing anger issues by taking time to reflect on when and why you get angry. Being able to identify patterns and triggers is a helpful step in learning how your own anger works. Anger issues can also be addressed by improving your communication skills, which include listening well to others, being able to express yourself clearly, and setting healthy boundaries in your relationships.

You must nurture your own well-being, and that includes getting enough sleep, eating well, and engaging in regular exercise and activities that calm you and bring you joy. You can make use of creative expression to articulate your feelings, and you can seek professional help in the form of anger management classes and therapy to help you identify and shift negative and unhealthy patterns of thought and behavior.

To learn more about managing anger and to meet with one of the faith-based therapists at our location, call us today.